Tips To Repair Unintentional Emotional Hurts

Your words and how they are expressed can damage or cause unintended hurts in interactions with others.

Inadvertent disrespects and offences thrive in everyday communications and relationships. Many times inadvertently you will do or say something that hurts a friend or family member’s feelings without you even realizing it.

Poor communication etiquette can rub recipients the wrong way and trigger emotional wounds. In other words, some things that wouldn’t necessarily bother you can be deeply upsetting and wounding to others.

The cause of such offences is typically inattentive listening, unsolicited fixing of concerns, disrespectful decision making, faux apologies and tactlessness or insensitivity.

Listening: Not taking the time to diligently listen to what is being said or shared, even distracted listening can cause an unintended distress.

If someone’s impression is that you did not listen, were not sensitive or failed to acknowledge their need to be heard this can trigger hurt feelings. Especially if the person is sensitive to being ignored or disregarded.

Unsolicited Fixing: Endeavouring to fix the other person’s problem especially without fully understanding the problem or considering the other person’s feelings or point of view can be upsetting and afflicting. Not connecting or not waiting to be asked for a response can be displeasing.

Moreover, you can undermine the person’s confidence by, being reactive or rash in your response or leaping straight to solutions. People can often fix their own problems and not want you fixing it. Sometimes they just need a sounding board or simply want to talk about or discuss a concern.

Decisions: Failure on your part to get the drift or cotton on to someone’s thoughts and input regarding a plan or a decision can be perceived as disrespectful. This is especially true if someone will be impacted by your decisions and is treated as their own needs or concerns do not really matter.

It may be considered an affront when you do not consult or collaborate and simply dictate.

Whenever the impression is that you’re self-centered, unconcerned or showing a lack of understanding this can spark a person’s feelings of being wounded.

Faux Apologizes: Statements like I am wrong, I am sorry are acceptable. However, if your apologies are followed by an excuse that may not ring true.and is deprecating.Your apology may sound phoney, be ineffectual or do more harm than healing.

Confidences: When you’re careless with other peoples shared confidences or personal details it might not seem like a big deal to you. But, it can probably be tactless, insensitive and upsetting to someone else.

Belittling or making someone feel small in front of friends or family because of a light-hearted dig regarding something about them can be really offending.

Summing Up: Here are 6 useful repairs for mending sloppy communication habits.

1. Take a little time to listen intently, to show that you care.This can change injured feelings
2. Instead of jumping in to fix someone else’s problems or taking impulsive action try to cease doing that. If opinions or solutions are wanted the person will ask for it.
3. Do not to be a fixer or give the notion that only you can correctly problem solve.
4. Yes, decisions do matter and at times they need to be done speedily. But, showing respect by being respectful is essential for non-toxic interactions. Get feedback and negotiate.
5. When you’re apologizing do not tag on an excuse. Eliminate the ‘BUT”s and the IF”s’ make sure an apology is forthright.
6. Remember that even nonchalantly or carelessly sharing confidences entrusted to you can be a cause for another person’s angst.
7. Avoid being negligent with what you share with other people, be considerate and kind. It”s always a best practice to ask permission prior to sharing other people’s confidences or personal information.
8. Thoughtfulness counts. A little thoughtfulness, mindful actions and attention go a long way to prevent displeasing and offending others. So, it”s best to just be thoughtful and do your utmost to be sensitive, caring and reflective.

In a perfect world, communicating would be perceptive and not muddled. But, since we are human mistakes will be made from time to time. With any luck, you’ll learn from your mistake(s) so that you would be more attentive not to repeat them on someone else.

Learning to be more thoughtful, more respectful and contemplative enriches your interactions and can build stronger compassionate relationships.

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